Being in the public spotlight comes with its share of scrutiny. I’ve gotten good at mostly ignoring it, but recently, I received a comment that made me keenly aware of a larger issue. A woman (mother) commented that I should be spending more time with my children. It’s funny to me that strangers seem to think they know how you spend the other 23 hours and 59 minutes of your day based on your daily social media post. But what actually disturbs me is that women seem to have a tendency to put other women down– perhaps in an effort to make ourselves feel better or validate our own choices. I find this ironic because the satisfaction you get from putting someone else down is so superficial and temporary compared to the authentic and long-lasting satisfaction that comes when you lift someone up.
As women and mothers, we need to encourage and support each other and realize that no two moms will ever be exactly the same-there is no perfect amount of time to spend with our children, work, self, relationships and others. Instead of judging, we should support other women as they try to find balance and make the best decisions they can. Let’s stop attacking one another and instead build each other up and help every woman be the greatest version of herself that she can be.
I was fortunate to spend the last week in Africa biking/hiking for the Virgin Strive Challenge to raise money for Big Change (reforms and funds education). I did this alongside of three of the hardest working moms I know-Sara Blakely, mom of four (w/twins), owner/inventor of Spanx; April Cleek, mom of four (w/twins), owner and CEO of EHR Concepts; and Deka Whaley, mom of two, financial services and one of the strongest women I’ve ever met.
These women embody what it means to be a working mom by balancing the hats (and helmets) they wear during the course of a day, all the while training for what was undeniably the hardest physical undertaking any of us had ever experienced. They were able to do this by having help from things like kindergarten after school care to look after their children until they return home and having supportive friends and family. But we got each other through it, not by calling each other names or by making snide remarks, but by standing together, encouraging and being there for one another…Women supporting women, and moms supporting moms.
